It was one of those funny, stress-relieving moments in the midst of a very stressful time. We were all waiting for Max’s truck to get fixed.

Max was my host, guide, pistol-toting security guard and now friend. He let me pitch my tent in his yard and opened his home to my needs. Max has a heart the size of his country. As an electrical engineer he works at the Presidential palace making sure there is radio communication for the national police. Literally seconds before the earthquake he was standing in a large building on the palace grounds which is now rubble. His body would have still been there. He quickly called his wife and found that his house and family were untouched.

He had a lot to be thankful for and he turned that gratitude into action. Because of him we were led to the two communities we are helping, Fort National and Dubuission. He has the respect and love of the people and he gets things done.

Max personally toured me around the palace grounds, showed me the bulk of the devastation around the city, and navigated hours of traffic congestion to accomplish our goals. But his truck broke down and for a while, we were stuck.

That’s when a big black turkey – one definitely suitable for a big meal – started cackling and pecking at its reflection in the shiny chrome bumper of another vehicle. After several pecks it would check under the truck as if expecting its enemy to have fled, only to rise up and see its nemesis still glaring right back at him, and the pecking and cackling would start again. This went on for an hour and most likely would have continued until the bumper fell off until someone finally chased it away.

Haiti has a way of making one reflect, and our turkey friend provided a perfect analogy. Whether you look at it from an insider or outsider perspective it seems the same: Haiti’s problems will never be solved until the turkey in the mirror stops pecking at itself. Whether you’re the Haitian blaming it on others or the NGO constantly addressing the surface issue, both only hurt themselves and leave one with a sense of futility, pecking at a problem that will only go away when you turn around and look at the real enemy.

I’m the last one who will try to say he has the solution. There are so many historical, macro-economic, religious and ego-driven power issues that complicate any solution. Haiti is certainly not the only country with these problems. But these and a constant barrage of environmental disasters have created a situation of poverty that requires a high level of resilience just to survive.

The earthquake has shaken more than buildings – it has shaken the power structure and you can sense the tension as people are waiting for the vacuum to be filled. Riots yesterday outside the Palace are examples of bursts of steam from the building pressure. Here in the US we criticize our president for lack of timely response or displays of involvement. Haiti’s president has barely shown his face. People are living in tents, under tarps, sharing a few latrines among hundreds, waiting 4 months now for a plan.

And in the meantime they see brand new UN and NGO vehicles plying the streets with privileges far beyond what any citizen enjoys. If you’re the one sweating under a tarp, living in stench, drowning with every rain – the one who has not yet been reached after 4 months of the aid coming in you would be angry and perhaps lash out, or even worse, give up and spend your days pecking at your own reflection.

But we shouldn’t be quick to judge or label. Let’s not be like Job’s friends who had the cause of his misery all figured out. It’s hard to know why this Haiti exists. We want to say its voodoo, or people are lazy, or ask why they can’t take care of themselves. I saw a voodoo sacrifice placed carefully in the middle of a road meant to appease an unknown power. I saw plenty of people lying around doing nothing – almost as if in shock. But I also saw lots of people taking care of themselves and others. People who lack resources but don’t lack resolve. People very aware of the delicate nature of how a free hand out can disrupt the balance in a community and destroy what resilience is left.

Like many I left Haiti with more questions than answers. And this is not always a bad thing. There have been plenty of answers given that have resulted in nothing. Maybe we need to ask more questions first. Answers show power, but questions show humility and open doors to hope and creativity.

Maybe, in a way we find difficult to understand because it sounds cruel, Haiti exists for us. Just as Job was crushed and uttered those familiar words, “I know that my Redeemer lives, and that in the end he will stand upon the earth,” we see a nation crushed and we ask God why. Our answers only show our ignorance. In the end, as God silenced Job by recounting His supreme place over him, we too are left merely to believe or disbelieve that He can and will redeem Haiti.